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PostPosted: Sun Nov 15, 2009 3:58 pm 
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Flange cheese munching cockend
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Mandy G wrote:
That is quite unfortunate, but made me smile am i a bad person?


I laughed out load......what's that make me?? :shock:

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PostPosted: Sun Nov 15, 2009 4:00 pm 
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Hawleytastic!
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Very very very bad :P

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PostPosted: Sun Nov 15, 2009 4:01 pm 
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Was it Domestarse?


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PostPosted: Sun Nov 15, 2009 4:02 pm 
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'Thinks he's a bit of alright'
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As long as you cleared up after yourself, you're only half bad :roll:

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PostPosted: Sun Nov 15, 2009 4:03 pm 
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maggie wrote:
Was it Domestarse?


HAAAA thats a good one Mags!!!! ..>

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PostPosted: Sun Nov 15, 2009 4:11 pm 
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On the subject of shite and bleach, I hope I'm not alone in not being able to resist havng a look at what I've produced before I flush it away.

Years ago I thought I'd managed to produce a white poo, you know like the ones dogs used to do, but it turned out my mam had been a bit heavy handed with the Vim - I'd used the loo without flushing it first and it had bleached everything in a very short space of time.


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PostPosted: Sun Nov 15, 2009 4:30 pm 
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Hot piece of Sheffield ass!
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Dave wrote:
I laughed out a load......what's that make me?? :shock:


well this would be the place for it.

Mick, you are not normal!

I only did it once as an adult but it was when I had a horrible stomach flu, I was laying in bed and the pressure of my retch blew out an horrific stream of the squirts, thankfully I had my pajama bottoms on so the mess was somewhat contained, I crawled to the bathroom and then crawled into the shower where the smell caused me to start puking again, which inevitably caused more tidal waves of shit and I spent the next hour or so hoping I could just hurry up and die.

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PostPosted: Sun Nov 15, 2009 5:34 pm 
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Same singer as previously. He ate a baguette and when he had finished his crown was missing. It had cost him a couple of hundred quid, so he decided he was going to await its reappearance & take it to the dentist to have it refitted.

The only problem with this from my point of view was that the band were playing in Italy at the time, and 4 of us were sharing a very cramped bedroom with a tiny en suite toilet, which was next to my bed. For the next 3 days we had the wonderful experience of him rifling through his poo a couple of times a day looking for his crown. :evil: :evil: :evil:

It never did turn up.

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PostPosted: Sun Nov 15, 2009 5:39 pm 
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I don't think I could be that dedicated to a tooth crown, hwever expensive :puker:

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PostPosted: Sun Nov 15, 2009 7:24 pm 
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The Boss
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horrific

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PostPosted: Sun Nov 15, 2009 7:47 pm 
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Hawleytastic!
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NickD wrote:
For the next 3 days we had the wonderful experience of him rifling through his poo a couple of times a day looking for his crown. :evil: :evil: :evil:

And you didn't extend the hand of friendship?

I bet he thought he'd found it a few times......only to realise it was sweetcorn!

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PostPosted: Sun Nov 15, 2009 10:05 pm 
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a bloke i know worked on the railways at night repairing em, he once needed a shit and went beind a hedge, no probs, then went back to work, it started to rain, he put his hood up, the same hood that is on his all in one outfit., the same hood he shit in when he pulled down his all in one outfit.

Shit splat on head.

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PostPosted: Sun Nov 15, 2009 10:12 pm 
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the boy hoy wrote:
a bloke i know worked on the railways at night repairing em, he once needed a shit and went beind a hedge, no probs, then went back to work, it started to rain, he put his hood up, the same hood that is on his all in one outfit., the same hood he shit in when he pulled down his all in one outfit.

Shit splat on head.


Classic!!! :*: :*: :*:

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PostPosted: Mon Nov 16, 2009 11:00 am 
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Quote:
my boss once got caught short in a carpark at night, and wiped his arse on a croissant


Hiking has seen me experiment with several natural arse wiping things. Once I resorted to a bunch of heather which just spreads shite everywhere. And then I was ages using other bits of heather to 'sweep' it into a controlled area where it could be flicked away with further sprigs.

Many years ago I went to the boozer with my boss. He went to the bog and returned with a three foot bit of skiddy riddled bog paper hanging out the back of his trousers. The pub was quite busy and the look on peoples faces was priceless. Telling him what he was done was great as he was a bit of a wanker.

Cheers, Steve.


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PostPosted: Mon Nov 16, 2009 11:21 am 
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Dave wrote:
an unfortunate incident when I was about 13 involving a gang of skinheads and dr martin boots making contact with my head. :?


Bet you wished you had never sung to them.

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